2012 - The Year of the Mares.

2012 has been a wild ride.  Quite literally.  But it's been a pretty fun one, and I'm happy with where I'm at with both of the girls and what we've managed to check off our list this year.  Let's have a bit of a recap, shall we?

January

Admittedly, our wedding sorta ate up January (whoops).  But Prairie was still down at the barn I bought her at, and Pia was still at Summer Camp.
I trekked down to P2 a couple of times for some rides on my own, and even a few lessons before the wedding.

Pia was totally ignored, but totally furry and adorable for January.

February

February had a great visit to P1 where we rode in a cold sunshine on a mountain, took cool thermal images, saw her poor blown out abscess and saw where we still had work on her back to get her comfortable.

I nearly died from muscle soreness after a weekend of lessons with P2 wherein I learned how many more muscles it was going to take for me to stay attached to the saddle on that big girl and then we promptly flew off to Africa for our honeymoon.  Sorry ponies.

March

The girls were good.  P and I had fun at Summer Camp (still) and Prairie and I had more lessons.  I made arrangements to bring Prairie home in April which meant we needed a trailer.

So we found the deal of the century on a still new 2009 and brought it home.

Yummy

April

April was a huge month.  We brought Prairie home, bought a saddle, had sexy photos taken by Supermom, then took both the mares down to Oregon for some Mountain Trail fun and started to get a routine going... whew.

Supermom photos!

Both P's on a field trip

Pia rocking it

Hacking at home

May

May was fun. S and I took P2 and gelding to the park for a field trip.  P2 was reasonably brave and we managed to have a productive hack.  Good omens for a possible show season.
I got called out on using my inside rein (a lot) and my horrid, horrid wrists.  Both things I've always struggled with.

Prairie started playing with more ground pole exercises and S even ventured to see what she looked like in Hunter tack.  Pia went on night rides and found a new boyfriend.  I lost my totally inspiring grandmother and took off with the family to reconnect and relax.

field trip!

June

June started with another field trip for some schooling and trail rides.  Prairie had her biggest scoot ever and The Boy helpfully videoed all of it.  It was a good lesson in figuring out how much to trust the mare (at that point) and a great chance to practice our first dressage tests in a new location

Then we went to our first show where we rode Training 2 and Training 3.  We won our first (small) blue ribbon and managed to stay in the arena.  Something I wasn't totally sure we'd pull off.  Technically I excused myself from our second test, but that was a smart decision. 

I took Prairie over our first jump together and discovered a whole new world for us to explore.

I had some great rides on P out at Summer Camp and summer was off to a great start.

Oh yeah - and The Boy upped his Horse Husband skills which I decided to capture in a lovely pic of him from wine tasting... ;)

July

The fun continued.  Prairie and snagged a 10 at our second show together. Which might mean that we've peaked too soon. (whoops).

Prairie made it very clear that she preferred just rocket launching herself over fences, which would give us plenty of things to work on.

Supermom joined me for a trip to Summer Camp and P overcame her fears of llamas.

Also, Supermom got a killer shot of P out in front of the herd.  Pia finally has herself totally integrated into the group...

Finally I caved in and got Prairie her own Hunter Outfit and we went to a tiny little show where she dominated the groundpole and crossrail division.  Nothing like stealing ribbons from 5 year olds on ponies... (eeeesh)

Also, I finally took some trimming lessons from my vet and stumbled my way through my first trim on Prairie.  Thank god she has straight forward, solid hooves.

August

With Summer in full swing somehow I managed to ride both mares in one day, in spite of a 3 hour drive between the barns (extra daylight, what!)
Pia continued to be a star at Summer Camp and was cute as a button

Prairie and I had a... crappy show which resulted in a dismal 55% at FL1 but 62% on our first ride of FL2.  My comment said "brave riding" and at one point the judge actually shouted out to make sure I was ok.  I shouted back that I was. :)

I'm okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy

We had more success over fences. The mare and I tackled a 3'9" vertical But S took her all the way to 4'.

Also, I had another great ride on Pia out at camp and made plans to bring her home (eventually).

September

September started out with an insane tack locker makeover to boost my spirits since the Big Mare was off.  We finally figured out that P2 was basically rein lame from holding herself funny to escape real work.

But we trudged on, and hit our first rated show as a pair which happened to be in Hunter Land.

Priarie settled in well and had some big successes, along with some very frustrating moments (mostly in warm up).  But for her first real show with a lot of atmosphere I was thrilled.

A few weeks later we spent a weekend at Summer Camp with both mares and had a blast.  Pia was a stud and hopped over cavaletti without any halter/bridle/whatever.  Prairie had a few lessons in manners and grew up a little.

Our final show of the year was canceled due to wildfires and I caved in and got a jump saddle for the first time since 1996.

October

October was a slow and easy month.  Pia played with gymnastics out at Camp. And Prairie played with Gymnastics at home.  My saddle (!!!) finally arrived, and I remembered what sitting in a balanced seat felt like.

Prairie and made strides with our collection and balance and then lost it all.  But we got it back with some tight, technical courses in the indoor.
We found one final show to go to and Prairie was a star.  Our changes are still not there, but she was calm, balanced and adjustable through our courses.  We had our first ever HUS class without a blue ribbon (sad), but it was a great outing (without any pictures).

Also we ventured to Brass Ring Farm for a lesson and had a blast.

November

Prairie and I ventured out for our first trail ride together which was an unexpected success.

Also, Pia came home and that was fabulous as well.  The mares are cute together.

we spent a couple weeks of weeks on the ground with the red mare before getting back in the saddle and she has been a happy, relaxed girl for all of it.

Well.  Most of it.  Both the mares were crazy and impossible for a few days which nearly had me convinced they should be released in the wild.  But they recovered and so did my affection for them. 
My wonderful old pony Star finally moved on to greener pastures and I cried about it.  A lot.

Finally, Prairie and I had another field trip for a lesson and it feels like I'm finally getting a partnership with this mare going.  Just in time for the holidays to throw a wrench in our routine...

our respectable canter

December

A scattered riding schedule has made everything a little less regular than I would like, but it's been a fun few weeks with the ladies.  Pia totally outshone Prairie when I tried to ride them in the rain (Priarie protested loudly) and I remembered that P1 really has grown up a lot in the last 18 months.  I experimented with a Pelham in Prairie's mouth and found it to be a great once-a-week tool to push our collection and balance.

The Boy totally spoiled me with a new truck that I can use anytime I want to take the girls on trips.  So I did.  We got a fun field trip back to Summer Camp where we worked on hooves and the girls had a brief ground work session

Star Light, Star Bright..

One thing I love about the holidays are all the little packages and parcels that land on your doorstep from distant family and friends.  There's something so much more exciting about a hand packaged parcel than the commercial cardboard from major retailers.

So I was thrilled when I found a little box on my doorstep from Star's erstwhile caretaker.  I was expecting a little bag of cookies or some other holiday treat, but was amazed and teary to find this:

A pretty little star shaped ornament (not Star shaped.. she was rounder and less pointy) with a lock of her tail and some pretty blue and white beads (our old xc colors) inside. 

There was also a bit more of her tail tucked in the box which has been added to the small braid I snipped off her tail a couple years ago.  I'm sure I'll think of something clever to do with that, but this shining little ornament with a twist of her tail is a gorgeous little memento. 


It will be a wonderful memory to pull out every year when we trim our tree.

**Getting misty eyed again, so I'm gonna call this a post :) ***

ps- Mares were medium good yesterday.  P1 was being fussy about outside leg and P2 thought that jumping 3 cavaletti on a circle was torturous.  Thankfully, both worked through their concerns...

I hope everyone has a fabulous Holiday Weekend with their loved ones (both furry and not).

A Goodbye.

The Matriarch.

Goodbyes. They're inevitable. 

With love, comes the possibility of loss and with our animals(/teachers/supporters/friends/confidants), it's almost a certainty.

I've been extraordinarily lucky with all of my animals.  I've only ever lost one dog (he was ancient and perfect and ready to go) and a few cats (some to age, one to cancer and a couple presumably to coyotes).  

I've never lost a horse. 

I've sold horses, and I've lost track of horses who I spent years with.  I suppose some of them have probably long since gone onto greener pastures, but not knowing is different than knowing, and yesterday I had the new experience of knowing that my dear, sweet (sorta mean), wise old pony was indeed ready to go. 

In her grand old age of forty-something, her body finally betrayed her age and after suffering from a few seizures, yesterday she had a bad choke.

Nothing was able to clear it, leaving surgery as the only option. 
A surgery that she probably wouldn't survive, and even if she did - what for?

So, one of my oldest and best-friends made the call.  She let me know what was going on, and since I was still hauling Prairie back up from our lesson, there was no feasible way for me to get to the pony without delaying her relief - something I couldn't even begin to ask of her.

Star hasn't been part of my daily riding life since I was 14.  But she's always been a part of who I am as a Rider, an Owner and a Person.  Some of my best moments and biggest achievements were on that pony.  She was the first horse I stayed up with all night during a colic.  The first horse I ever gave a bath to or braided for a schooling show.  She was the first horse I fell off and the first horse I qualified for nationals on.  She taught me pretty much everything I know about not getting bit, or kicked, or scraped off on a tree on the trail.

She professionally refused to acknowledge any previous training and taught me to teach her.  I'll never forget the first Prelim cross country fence I took (or rather, she took me over) and I'll certainly never forget my first Musical Freestyle.  More importantly, she was that perfect friend and supporter through adolescence and gave me the unconditional affection that every 12 year old girl needs from somewhere.

One of my favorite memories was one night after a fight with my parents (presumably about making my bed or math or something equally epic) and I decided that I was running away. I thoughtfully packed a backpack of snacks and books (I was really going to be prepared), but then after slipping out my window and making my way to the barn I realized books weren't as important as grain for my pony, so I dumped out my backpack, filled it with Star's grain and then legged up and trotted away bareback. 

I'm pretty sure I was only gone for a few hours, but for those few hours I had my pony, some granola bars and enough grain to keep Star motivated for a couple of days.  It was all a 13 year old really needs. 

So I'll miss her.  Even though I wasn't the one making her mashes every morning or bringing her in from her pasture every night, I'll miss knowing that my old, cranky pony was tootling around enjoying her retirement.  And I'll miss the occasional text with a picture of her doing something absurd. 

But I'm glad that the last time I saw her she was trotting around a giant field and scratching her rump on a pile of lumber. 

And I take (almost) total comfort in the fact that she was a strong, healthy, happy pony for the last 20 years of her life that I had the pleasure of knowing her. 

So Star - I thank you for all of it (even the hard parts) and I'll never forget you.

One of my first rides on the lady.

and one of my last visits to see her.

A few more details on the pony are here and here

Flash Back....

While we're on the sentimental streak... I stumbled onto a collection of pictures of Star (the ancient white pony)back from the beginning of our relationship.

They came from a box of photos from my Aunt's house, and as far as I can tell, they are almost entirely from the same day.  They aren't dated, but based on the level of construction going on with our property (i.e.- FENCES) I think it was pretty gosh darn close to when I first brought Star home.  Also, the massive-tack-whore in me realized upon further inspection that Star is (proudly) wearing her original saddle, but a new(er) bridle, and I am riding in giant-rubber-boots.

The first photo is me, my grandfather and Star when she was still a school pony at the barn I took lessons at.  She was a total hellion and no one else would ride her except for me (also a hellion?).  I think this was pretty close to when I "bought" her, but I just LOVE my big mushroom helmet and it's super chic rain cover...

I was always SO proud of her

As for the rest of the pics, they were the following year, and here's how I know that...
Star ONLY wore her cardboard original saddle and the bridle that it came with (the whole package including a "girth", leathers and irons was a whopping $119 at our local feed store, tack stores were for rich people) UNTIL that Christmas when we got a new (extremely fancy) raised snaffle bridle from the local tack shop (see? fancy.) My mom actually suggested the purchase when she noticed that our cheapo-feed-store bridle was dying my pony's ears and nose pink every time she sweat.  It was not a quality piece of tack.  Of course, even from the fancy tack store, there was no flash bridle in perfect pony size available, so we're sporting an only slightly ghetto flash attachment.

So I know it's after xmas of '93 (where we also received a super trendy green NZ turnout rug)... but before my birthday in '94 because that's when I replaced my giant rubber boots with some actual leather field boots as a present to myself.  I couldn't tell you who was president (ok maybe I could) or what I learned in school that year, but I can recite (perfectly) every horse related acquisition I ever got under the age of 20. 

So, based on my tack-whore-calculations, these pictures were taken sometime during the spring of 1994.  Which makes Star 20 or 21 at the time and I think she looks pretty darn good.

 What other amazing thing did we get in the spring of 1994????

A super fantastic 1972 King two-horse straight load trailer.  Complete with ancient rubber mats and plenty of rust.  But the thing was cheap, and the fact that it was Blue & White (my self proclaimed cross country colors) meant that it was meant to be mine...

I compulsively scrubbed, blasted and repaired this thing...

Star hated the thing though... hated

 Giant. Rubber. Boots.  And yes, I'm riding in sweatpants (that.. is something that I do not remember

Now for the fantastic arena that Dad built me all on his own.  When we were done with it, it had gorgeous flower beds terraced in at the short end, fencing (duh) and good enough lights to jump long after the sun went down.  But, this is it's infant stage, though clearly I didn't care.

(Star was also skeptical of this place where she had to do dressage sometimes..)

The woods beyond the ring is where we built all of our homemade deathtraps cross country fences.  I still have dreams every once in a while about galloping through them on our little trails...

We looked like this a lot in those early years...

But she could still jump the moon.

Annnnd... a few more just for good measure (and because I have them)

Getting ready in the barn (also built by Dad)

See, ghetto flash attachment, but no dyed ears/nose

Standard Pony Expression (SPE)

And my brother would shoot me if he knew I ever let this photo see the light of day again.. but I can't resist a good old fashion Holiday Photo with the PONY!!!!!  This is just before we got that new bridle.. note, no flash attachment, and I can assure some dyed pink ears under that santa hat...

bahahahaha, none of us look good here.. but look how happy dad is with his pitchfork! I think this was his favorite holiday card ever....

Such amazing memories with that little beast and that little farm.  I learned so much on those few acres.

I love this picture of us <3

As for the rest of that stuff.. the giant-rubber-boots have been long gone, the cardboard original saddle is still in my garage, and the crappy, old, leathers are still my favorite to jump with - and in fact have been used in every show of my life.. how they haven't disintegrated in the rain.. I have no idea.  The bridle went with Star up to her retirement fields and that massive mushroom helmet was thrown out after I hit a tree while galloping around in the woods (whoops).

Still Alive! (Both me and the pony..)

Sorry for the absence... turns out when your horse is two hours away the flow of information isn't exactly as, well... abundant.  (and as The Boy can attest, when I am sans horse, I turn into sort of a useless, boring lump on the couch.  Not exactly what I would call exciting writing material).

This weekend, however saw a bit of horsey time - and I am proud to proclaim that I have not been lost to the vast abyss of wedding-induced-insanity, nor have I be claimed by the insufferable pit of despair that surrounds remodeling houses and moving into them.

I'm even more proud to proclaim that Star, the stubborn little beast that she is, is still alive and mostly kickin.

Sunday included both a quick trip up to Monroe to watch Supermom kick ass and take names (along with a few unanimous championships) on her new little mare before we continued up north to see the wise old pony herself.

hi, pony.

When we got there, Starlight was just happily hanging out in her pasture, soaking up the sun, and gumming some grass happily.  In all honesty, that little mare looks pretty damn good.  Yes, her left hind is a bit filled, yes her right hind has a pretty dropped suspensory.. but she's happy, quiet, relaxed and eating well.

She isn't moving around a ton, but she is still moving around without prodding.  less gallopy, gallopy than last time I saw her, but she still scoots around her pasture regularly and has enough dexterity to lay down and get up daily without any assistance.  All in all, I have to say I was expecting much, much worse.

D is nothing short of a miracle worker in her care and expertise in balancing the pony's growing list of concerns. But somehow she manages to make sure that in resting one leg, Star isn't stressing another too much, and balancing the difficulty of her trims, with a slightly longer hoof..  It's not an easy job and I know that other owners would have given up ages ago.  However, seeing Star, happy, comfortable and just enjoying a warm sunny day makes me glad for every extra day of retirement that this pony gets.  Lord knows she's earned them.

This trip was the first time The Boy has gotten to meet Star and I think he was shocked at how little she is.  He couldn't quite grasp the fact that somehow I used to fit on top of her let alone the fact that when I got her, I couldn't see over her back.

seeing over her back isn't so much an issue anymore...

I really couldn't have asked for a better Sunday.  Sure it would have been nice to be riding P (or *gasp* even showing her), but in reality, hanging around a show, seeing friends and patting the old pony are pretty fantastic ways to fill a day.

She is the cutest.  Even all hairy and fat.

Hope (and ponies) Spring Eternal

The other day I got a call from my good friend up north who, among her other talents and endeavors, is the caretaker/custodian/miracle worker who has kept Star (the ancient pony) not only alive, but happy, fat and appropriately cranky.

Since Star is (by our best estimation) pushing 40, every time there's a bump or a bruise, or a stiffened step, we reasonably prepare ourselves for what is sure to eventually be the downfall of such a sturdy little champion.  In fact, over the past four years, we've had at least once annual scare, which has resulted in D making the dutiful call that this might actually be it, and to inform me the vet will be coming out tomorrow...

I can distinctly remember one call that came while I was in the middle of teaching a three day seminar.  At the time I was reviewing some tools on identifying our personal roles, missions, and impact when I just totally flipping lost it.

Trying to coach a room full of our (fantastic) contractor folks on putting pen to paper about their hopes and dreams is not nearly as futile as stereotypes would make it seem, but all my mushy, gushy, encouragement about where we've been, what we've done and how we'll be remembered was enough to send me into a tail spin since all I could think about was my damn cute pony and how she'd probably accomplished more in her 30+ years than I will when I reach her age.

Of course, in brilliant pony form, she righted herself and set about to several more years of terrorizing the big horses around her and conning anyone close enough into giving her treats

But this week I got another call.  Same story, same worries - this time might actually be it.

I mean , Star is 38 (by my current count, but who knows, a lady never tells her age) and even I can admit that she's got more than a few aged tells that belie her mischievous little face - But in every previous instance, she's always (ALWAYS) pulled out of it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not delusional.  I understand that most people don't have pets that were born in the 70's (parrots and elephants excluded..) and I also am entirely supportive of D letting her go whenever it is that she's no longer enjoying her daily life.  I get it.

At one point we figured out that Star was alive when my mom was in college.  That's insane.  Not only has this pony had significantly more careers than I have, but she's laid witness to some interesting political times, progress, and development.  That deserves some serious respect (which she clearly demands) and is a little mind blowing to think about.

Somehow it makes it both easier and harder to think about her being gone.  I've lost other horses and pets over the years, but somewhere, rooted deeply in my 12 year old brain, I still feel like Star will just always be there.

It almost feels like the certainty of a first love.  That notion that it will never-ever (even if he goes to college before you) disappear.

As a kid, I never thought Star would disappear.
As an adult, I consciously *know* that she will, but there's still a lingering shred of adolescent that hopes she won't.

Of course, I will always have my favorite photos of our first cross county run, our favorite spot out in our woods, her galloping in the pasture, me sleeping on her back and the first time we scored 70% in a second level test. For such a small little thing, her extended trot was something of glory.... the lateral work? different story.  Her dressage progressed steadily in our years together, although I could never be certain if it was because Star became more willing to acknowledge how much she actually knew, or if because my approaching 5'11" frame could dictate where her balance was a bit more effectively :)...

This time, it looks like she stabilized again... at least for the time being.  I'm sure Star's still not out of the woods, but I'm never surprised to get the follow-up call saying that she's on fluids and anti-inflams and seems to be fine.  That little pony is probably perfectly preserved in her 38 year collection of piss and vinegar.  Not much else explains it quite frankly.

Regardless, she's still my first love, and always will be even if her little gray nose finally gets beyond my reach.